Snowblind IC Inbox

[godsspeed]

@whatisthis

This device is meant to be a means of long-distance communication. It seems remarkably impractical.

Regardless, if you leave me a 'message' I will do my best to respond.

Comments

@jwatson; text; Day 237

[jumpthegun]

[John feels compelled to message Castiel directly after hanging up on Dorian. Maybe the angel isn't paying attention to that conversation, but if he is, John wants to be clear.]

Castiel, I just want you to know, for the record, you're not an abomination, whatever that Pavus bloke says, you have every right to exist here, just the same as anyone else, whatever you are and however you came into body you're sharing.

text

[godsspeed]

Yes. I have been watching, though I wasn't sure if it would be a good idea for me to intervene.

[ There's a slight hesitation before he sends the rest of his response. He isn't sure how much of this he wants to admit, but it's weighing on him too heavily to keep entirely to himself. ]

I appreciate you trying to defend me, but he is right in many ways. I've done much to wrong the man whose body I currently inhabit, all in the service of a greater good that I'm not sure was either of those things to begin with.

text

[jumpthegun]

[... oh. Well, but that proves it! That just proves John's point that Castiel does have a conscience, and he's thinking about these things. The doctor feels mildly vindicated.]

Right in many ways doesn't mean completely right, and not where it matters. The man whose body you're inhabiting. It was something voluntary, right? He invited you in. Is he still there in your thoughts?

[godsspeed]

Yes. Angels can only take mortal vessels with their explicit and continuous consent. He could have cast me out at any time, if he didn't wish to continue to serve. And normally I would be able to rescind control to him and become a passive observer, but for some reason I am unable to do so in this place.

He is here and aware of his surroundings, though not as acutely as he would be if he were by himself. An angel's senses are different from a human's, even as dulled as mine are here. Most have trouble processing the way we experience creation.

[jumpthegun]

[Further vindication! Sort of. Maybe. John's hearing what he wants to hear in this conversation, probably, more-so than the real implications of what Castiel is saying.]

Have you ever heard of any angel outstaying their welcome in a human host? What happens if a human decides they don't want you anymore? Do they just cast you out? Just like that?

[godsspeed]

If a vessel rescinds their consent then the angel inhabiting them must return control and leave immediately. It is impossible for us to stay when we are not wanted. This sort of rejection has been known to happen, but it's rare. We don't intervene in this way often, and when we do we choose our allies carefully.

[ From among the desperate and the destitute, in the case of some angels. People who have nothing to live for but this one act of service. Others convince their vessels once and then never allow them out of situations where parting ways would not mean being stranded or left for dead for the duration of the mission. It's a practice that Castiel found distasteful, but he had always been able to overlook it in his conviction that it served a higher purpose. That these people would receive what they were due and more in exchange for their sacrifice.

Again, now he's not so sure. ]

[jumpthegun]

[That's comforting. It's a little bit of trouble that Castiel can't relinquish control right now, but knowing that under normal circumstances, the man he's possessing could take the wheel at any time he so chose to... that's good. That's all right. It's more all right than the alternative and what Dorian had been describing.]

Okay. That sounds reasonable. I'm glad that's the way it normally works. Thanks for telling me all of this, by the way. I know you might feel guilty about the current situation, but it's not one you chose or the man you're possessing. You guys didn't make the decision here. Keep that in mind if Dorian's ever bothering you, all right?

[godsspeed]

Thank you. I appreciate the intent behind your coming here and speaking to me about this, even if I'm not so sure that I agree that I'm justified in doing this anymore.

You are right, though. There is nothing I can do about it now, other than continue working to get everyone out of here safely. Including my vessel.

[jumpthegun]

Right. And you can sort out the details with him once that's possible. Good luck Castiel, and let me know if you need anything.